This past week in our videoblog we asked the question, “What is your greatest fear?” We received some amazing answers. Most people had one word answers which was surprising…even my answer was brief…“Being Alone”. My favorite answer was fear. “What do you fear most?” “Fear”.
I have found myself reflecting on it quite a bit. I like my alone time, but don’t want to BE alone. I like knowing that I have a boyfriend. I want him to be there forever. That, of course, is an awful lot of pressure for anyone, and I am curious how it affects my relationship…and my life. Oddly I like my “alone” time, but can enjoy it knowing that ultimately I am not alone. Of course it begs a larger question of are we alone and in a way aren’t we all alone? And what about that which is greater than I, but I am not ready to tackle that one. I have to deal with my humanity….and the fact is I don’t like to be alone.
It also got me thinking about how my fear of being alone affects my life. I work really hard at being great boyfriend because first I am an overachiever, but 2ndly, I don’t want to lose him and be alone. I often acquiesce on issues for fear of upsetting the apple cart and having someone mad at me. People will go away if they don’t like me and then I will be alone. Yikes. I don’t particularly like that thought process, but that is what these questions do for me. They make me think. I suppose I like the comfort of the city because there is always someone near.
Have a look and let me know your reactions. What do you fear?
creating this life 